A few things on a rainy New England Friday

For several years now I have teased my wife that "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" is a silly show and a waste of time. In fact, I have found it so juvenile, I usually leave the room when it is on and putter around on the computer instead. Yet she stubbornly insisted that is was a good, harmless show. And, lo and behold, Weekly Standard runs this long article saying it was the best show ever made for television. I stand chastened and rebuked.

What is the ultimate point of Annika Sorenstam's playing in the PGA this weekend? Most commentators keep saying the idea is that "she can play with the men," but it must be more than that, else the idea of it all is rather empty. So she can shoot a 71 from the men's tees...and? It would seem the implication of the Sorenstam event is either (1.) to get the LPGA to use the men's tees and hence eliminate the differences between itself and the PGA, or (2.) to eliminate the two golfing associations and merge them into one (point #1 would nearly do that anyway). Is this necessary? I generally believe doing things based on observable need -- does golf NEED this change? Will tennis follow next? Prediction: within the next year, the Williams sisters will try and play the men.

And finally, on a lighter note, let's talk about "lawn art." Lawn art is viewable in every suburban neighborhood, and takes on many different forms: shadow figures, plastic ducks, wooden ladies who bend over and show their underwear, mysterious metallic globes, etc. Now, my wife and I find lawn art to be rather stupid and tasteless (in fact, she suggested this blog), and an effort to divert attention from the front of a person's house. Why? Either because they don't manicure it very well or the house/garden/lawn is beyond carpentry/landscaping effort. So, instead, driving by, the eye is drawn not to the pealing paint or overgrown grass, but to a frightening plastic pig. If you must have lawn art, please observe the following two rules:

1.) Study and implement the principle of proportionality. Lawn art is awful enough, but when you place giant ducks next to a dwarfish Uncle Sam what was once silly becomes scary. These ducks must be waist-high to the nation's symbol, giant mutant ducks as big as horses. So, to avoid this problem, either get a bigger Uncle Sam or smaller ducks.
2.) Pay attention to theme. What exactly do Uncle Sam, blueish metallic globes, and shadow cowboys have in common? Nothing. They are just a haphazard grouping of lawn art, all congregated on the grass, without any guiding theme. Drivers don't know what to think. Is this a commentary on the nation: patriotism, new ageism, and a fondness for the Old West? Instead, if you use farm animals, use only farm-oriented lawn art; ducks, pigs, cows, a tractor, silo, etc. If you use Uncle Sam, add a few flags, a Statue of Liberty, maybe a White House or bust of Washington. It may be silly, but at least you are showing a bit of thought.

Lawn art is still silly and ugly, but with a little effort it can still be moderately thoughtful.