So the great Dr. Curmudgeon Super Bowl War began. For two weeks the Style Editor and the Ombudsman will be locked in an epic struggle for football bragging rights with Doc and the Scooter. As much as it pains me to take a position against the Scooter, I am here to tell him crawl into the farthest corner of the house right now, little doggie, before the big, bad Eagles get you.

And I have this to say to the Doc, where's your all civilizing influence of classical music now?